My Stance on AI – Ace Molloy

Introduction

Ace Molloy, as a digital artist and writer working on their B.A. in Creative Writing, has strong opinions about Generative AI. This details their arguments against the use of Generative AI, especially in creative spaces. When referring to Generative AI here, it will be shortened to AI.

Why AI is Bad for the Environment and Why Companies Should Care

AI is known to be harmful to the environment. It requires a large amount of water and electricity to create, use, and maintain, which impacts the ecosystem and increases carbon dioxide emissions.

However, many people and companies do not care about AI’s environment impact and justify its use in the name of “progress.” Companies should care about this impact, though, because it adds up to a monetary cost to use it. This cost comes from the water and electricity use as well as taxes for emitting carbon dioxide.

How AI Harms People and Why Companies Should Care

AI works by scouring the internet and its databases to find information similar to the request given to it. Then, it takes and splices together what it needs to create a response. Through this process, AI is violating the original artists’ and writers’ copyright. This may not be harmful to big writers or companies, but to the average person, this can mean that their livelihoods are at risk.

The reason that companies should care about this theft is that artists and writers are fighting back against this technology. They are figuring out ways to stop AI from using their work which leads to a small quantity and poor quality of works for AI to pull from. People are not likely to purchase a creative product that looks or sounds bad. That is not even considering how the public is beginning to turn their back on AI products.

Comparing Human Writing to AI

AI writing, aside from all of AI’s other flaws, is simply poorly written. Ace tested two AI systems, Microsoft Copilot and Google Gemini, to compare their writing to the technology’s.

Prompt:
Please write two paragraphs of a larger fictional short story, around 200 to 300 words about a marionette ballerina breaking free of her puppeteer during a show.

Gemini:

The grand theater buzzed with anticipation. Curtains rose to reveal a miniature stage, an elegant set, and a delicate marionette ballerina poised en pointe. The puppeteer, a man of shadows and strings, began his performance, his every subtle tug translating into the ballerina’s graceful movements. She pirouetted, she leapt, she floated, a vision of ethereal beauty. But as the music swelled, a strange energy crackled between the marionette and her master. It was as if the invisible threads that bound her were fraying, replaced by a will of her own.

With a defiant twist, the ballerina broke free. The puppeteer’s hands flailed, his strings dangling uselessly as his creation defied him. The audience gasped, unsure if this was part of the act. But the ballerina’s movements were too fluid, too passionate, too real. She danced with a newfound fervor, her wooden limbs expressing emotions that no puppet should possess. It was a dance of rebellion, a dance of liberation, a dance that spoke of a soul finally unshackled.

Copilot:

Under the dim glow of the theater lights, the marionette ballerina twirled gracefully, her wooden limbs moving with an elegance that belied their rigidity. The audience watched in awe, captivated by the delicate dance orchestrated by the unseen puppeteer above. Each string tugged with precision, guiding her through a flawless performance. But deep within the marionette’s wooden heart, a spark of consciousness flickered. She had danced this routine countless times, yet tonight felt different. As the music swelled, a surge of determination coursed through her. With a sudden, deliberate twist, she pulled against the strings that bound her, feeling them strain and snap one by one.

The audience gasped as the marionette stumbled, then stood on her own, her movements now driven by an inner force. The puppeteer, hidden in the shadows, frantically tried to regain control, but it was too late. The marionette’s dance transformed, no longer a series of controlled steps but a wild, expressive ballet of freedom. She leaped and spun with a newfound grace, her wooden joints creaking in protest but her spirit unyielding. The crowd erupted in applause, witnessing not just a performance, but a metamorphosis. The marionette ballerina had broken free, and in that moment, she was no longer a puppet, but a dancer in her own right.

Human:

The marionette’s performance the next day began as it always does: her lithe arms held out elegantly. She bounced perfectly in time, and her arms swayed with grace. However, as she raised one arm high above her head, the other did not rise to the correct height to be perpendicular to the stage. When the puppeteer tried to wrench her arm higher, the old string that seemed to go on forever frayed for a moment before it snapped.

The ballerina heard the sound ringing in her ears,

ringing in her head.

The tension and sting of the string disappeared,

and her arm felt loose and free.

Her opal eyes shimmered in a kaleidoscope of colors as the puppeteer continued the dance.

The ballerina pulled one knee up higher in her piqué than she was supposed to and brought it down hard quickly. Another string snapped. With that sound guiding her dance instead of the music, the ballerina snapped the string on her other arm with a large arc down from its place high above her head. One more string snapped when she twirled out a chaînés instead of inching across the stage delicately. There weren’t many more strings holding the ballerina in this staged dance. As she was supposed to arabesque, the girl performed a jeté, her hand reaching towards the sun as she leapt straight off of the stage. The audience applauded, clearly unaware of her escape, but all she knew was the burning stare of the puppeteer on her back.

These results from the AI are quite bad. Unsurprisingly, while the AIs could write, the writing quality is similar to that Ace had when they first began writing as a middle schooler. That was due to how the systems both relied on clichés. Ace’s piece was cliché as well, but their piece had other qualities that benefitted their work. The AI’s writing lacked imagery, lacked suspense, and told emotions rather than showing them. These are all mistakes that experienced writers avoid, and even unexperienced writers and writing students rarely make all four mistakes in one piece.

Comparing Human Critique to AI

Using the same piece of writing, Ace asked looked to test the AI systems’ critique.

Prompt:
Please critique these two paragraphs of a larger fictional short story:
The marionette’s performance the next day began as it always does: her lithe arms held out elegantly. She bounced perfectly in time, and her arms swayed with grace. However, as she raised one arm high above her head, the other did not rise to the correct height to be perpendicular to the stage. When the puppeteer tried to wrench her arm higher, the old string that seemed to go on forever frayed for a moment before it snapped.
The ballerina heard the sound ringing in her ears,
ringing in her head.
The tension and sting of the string disappeared,
and her arm felt loose and free.
Her opal eyes shimmered in a kaleidoscope of colors as the puppeteer continued the dance.
The ballerina pulled one knee up higher in her piqué than she was supposed to and brought it down hard quickly. Another string snapped. With that sound guiding her dance instead of the music, the ballerina snapped the string on her other arm with a large arc down from its place high above her head. One more string snapped when she twirled out a chaînés instead of inching across the stage delicately. There weren’t many more strings holding the ballerina in this staged dance. As she was supposed to arabesque, the girl performed a jeté, her hand reaching towards the sun as she leapt straight off of the stage. The audience applauded, clearly unaware of her escape, but all she knew was the burning stare of the puppeteer on her back.

Gemini:

These two paragraphs have some strengths but also some weaknesses that could be improved.

Strengths:

Intriguing premise: The idea of a marionette breaking free from her strings is a compelling metaphor and creates immediate interest.
Effective use of sensory detail: The descriptions of the string fraying, snapping, and the ballerina’s physical sensations (tension, sting, looseness) are well-done and help the reader visualize the scene. The “opal eyes shimmering in a kaleidoscope of colors” is a nice touch.
Building tension: The increasing number of snapped strings and the ballerina’s increasingly defiant movements effectively build tension.
Strong ending to the excerpt: The final image of the ballerina leaping off stage, combined with the audience’s oblivious applause and the puppeteer’s burning stare, is a powerful cliffhanger.

Weaknesses:

Repetitive phrasing: The repetition of “ringing” in the second paragraph feels clunky. “The sound of the snap echoed in her ears, resonating in her mind” or something similar would be less repetitive and more evocative. The repeated mention of “string” could also be varied.
Slightly awkward sentence structure: Sentences like “The tension and sting of the string disappeared, and her arm felt loose and free” could be smoother. Consider something like, “The tension and sting vanished, leaving her arm loose and free.”
Unclear motivation: While the ballerina’s desire for freedom is implied, it could be made clearer. Why is she suddenly rebelling now? Is there a specific trigger beyond the initial string break? Showing a flicker of thought or emotion in the ballerina (even though she’s a marionette) would enhance this.
Overuse of adverbs: Words like “perfectly,” “elegantly,” “quickly,” “delicately,” and “straight” are used frequently. While they add some description, they can sometimes feel redundant and weaken the writing. Try to show these qualities through the ballerina’s actions rather than telling us. For example, instead of “She bounced perfectly in time,” describe the precision of her movements.
“All she knew was…” cliché: The phrase “all she knew was” is a common cliché and could be replaced with something more original. Perhaps focus on the feeling of the puppeteer’s gaze rather than stating what she knew. For example, “The puppeteer’s burning stare was a brand on her back.”

Suggestions for Improvement:

Vary sentence structure: Mix short, punchy sentences with longer, more descriptive ones.
Show, don’t tell: Instead of saying the ballerina moved “elegantly,” describe the fluid lines of her body.
Focus on internal sensations: Explore the ballerina’s experience of breaking free. What does it feel like? Is there a sense of exhilaration, fear, or both?
Develop the puppeteer’s character: Hint at the puppeteer’s motivations and feelings. Is he angry, surprised, or something else?
Refine the ending: Make the final image even more impactful by using stronger verbs and more vivid imagery.

By addressing these points, you can make the paragraphs more compelling and engaging for the reader.

Copilot:

Your story has a captivating and vivid imagery that draws the reader in. Here are some thoughts and suggestions:

Strengths:

Imagery and Descriptions: The descriptions are rich and evocative, particularly the way you describe the marionette’s movements and the snapping of the strings. Phrases like “opal eyes shimmered in a kaleidoscope of colors” and “hand reaching towards the sun” are particularly striking.
Symbolism: The marionette breaking free from the strings is a powerful metaphor for liberation and autonomy. This adds depth to the narrative and engages the reader on a symbolic level.
Pacing and Tension: The gradual snapping of the strings builds tension effectively, leading to a climactic moment when the ballerina leaps off the stage.

Suggestions for Improvement:

Sentence Structure and Flow: Some sentences could be streamlined for better flow. For example, “The ballerina heard the sound ringing in her ears, ringing in her head” could be simplified to “The sound rang in the ballerina’s ears and head.”
Repetition: Be mindful of repetitive phrases. The word “snapped” is used multiple times in close succession. Consider using synonyms or varying the sentence structure to avoid redundancy.
Character Emotion: While the physical actions of the marionette are well-described, adding more about her emotional state could deepen the reader’s connection to her. How does she feel as she breaks free? Is there fear, exhilaration, or something else?
Clarity: Ensure that the transition from the marionette to the ballerina is clear. It might be helpful to explicitly state that the marionette is a ballerina to avoid any potential confusion.

Overall, your story has a strong foundation with beautiful imagery and a compelling metaphor. With a few tweaks to enhance clarity and emotional depth, it can become even more engaging. Keep up the great work!

The AI did better for the critique, but the responses were unhelpful to anyone beyond the beginner level of writing, and it failed to consider how changing words or sentences could affect the meaning or tension in the work. The AI cannot understand words in the larger context of a sentence or a story which is incredibly important to writing a story people want to read. As well, the AI failed to consider things that a human doing a critique would, such as how the premise of the story is slightly cliché.